Profane Chinese Chinese swear words, profanity, curses, and dirty talk, made simple.

I had the unique experience of coming out of the closet shortly before I left the U.S. to spend three years in China. My first real exposure to the gay universe took place over there. As such, I became familiar with the wealth of slang used among the gay community in the PRC, which I will share with you here.

Penis:
鸡巴 -- ji1 ba1
老二 -- lao3 er4
小弟弟 -- xiao3 di4 di (lit. "little brother"; this is more common among kids than adults)
diao3 -- I don't have the character for this in my input software, unfortunately, but it contains the phonetic radical 吊 under the radical for reclining body 尸
JJ -- pronounced ji1 ji1, this is IM slang
东西 -- dong1 xi1 (lit. "thing")
阴茎 -- yin1 jing1 (this is the proper word for "penis")
长 -- chang2 -- long
粗 -- cu1 -- thick
厘米 -- li3 mi3 -- centimeters (using inches may shatter the popular stereotype about Caucasians vs. Asians in the mind of your prospective Chinese partner)
包皮 -- bao1 pi2 -- foreskin
龟头 -- gui1 tou2 -- penis head (literally "turtle head"; watch the skin on a turtle's neck does when it enters and emerges from its shell, and you'll see why it's called this; Note: It has to do with circumcision being rare in China)
割包皮 -- ge1 bao1 pi2 -- circumcision (rare in China)
睾丸 -- gao1 wan2 -- testicles
阴毛 -- yin1 mao2 -- pubic hair

El Ano:
屁股 -- butt
肛门 -- sphincter

Sex acts:
手淫 -- shou3 yin2 -- masturbation
相互手淫 -- xiang4 hu4 shou3 yin2 -- mutual masturbation
玩鸡巴 -- wan2 ji1 ba1 -- play with oneself
口交 -- kou3 jiao1 -- oral sex
肛交 -- gang1 jiao1 -- anal sex
主动 -- zhu3 dong4 -- top (i.e. the giver)
被动 -- bei4 dong4 -- bottom (i.e. the taker)
1 -- yi1 -- top
0 -- ling2 -- bottom ("1" and "0" are used both online and in regular conversation; whoever came up with that is pretty clever, albeit in a pervy sort of way)
舔 -- tian3 -- lick
吸 -- xi1 -- suck
吃1 -- chi1 -- eat (used synonymously with xi1)
吃豆腐 -- chi1 dou4 fu3 -- have sex (lit. "eat one's tofu")
做爱 -- zuo4 ai4 -- have sex ("make love" is a more accurate translation)
三个人的性 -- san3 ge4 ren2 de xing4 -- three-way
六喝茶 -- liu4 he1 cha2 -- six-way (lit. "six drink tea"; I heard this in Guilin back in 2001, so it might be local slang)

Sample sentences:
你的鸡巴多长? -- ni3 de ji1 ba1 duo1 chang2? -- How long is yours?
" " 多粗1? -- " " duo1 cu1? -- How thick?
你的JJ很长吗? -- ni3 de ji1 ji1 hen3 chang2 ma? -- Are you pretty long?
我想为你口交 -- wo3 xiang3 wei4 ni3 shou3 yin2 -- I want to go down on you
我想吃你的鸡巴 -- wo3 xiang3 chi1 ni3 de ji1 ba1 -- same as above
我想和你做0 -- wo3 xiang3 he2 ni3 zuo4 ling2 -- I want to be your bitch
我想和你做1 -- wo3 xiang3 he2 ni3 zuo4 yi1 -- I want you to be my bitch
我想吃你的豆腐 -- wo3 xiang3 chi1 ni3 de dou4 fu3 -- I want to have sex with you
你是1还是0? -- ni3 shi4 yi1 hai2 shi4 ling2? -- Are you a top or bottom?
你割包皮没有? -- ni3 ge1 bao1 pi2 mei2 you3? -- Are you circumcised? (Again, the answer is likely to be "没有," as in "no")
你做过三个人的性吗? -- ni3 zuo4 guo4 san1 ge ren2 de xing4 ma? -- Ever been in a three-way?
你有视频头吗? -- ni3 you3 shi4 pin2 tou2 ma? -- Do you have a webcam?
你有图片吗? -- ni3 you3 tu2 pian4 ma? -- Do you have any pictures?